Wednesday, July 18, 2018

The Movie Of The Game (Part One): Warcraft

Why do they bother?  Adapting any work from a pre-established creative universe is pretty much doomed to failure.  And Warcraft is no exception.  The film tracks the plot of the first RTS title of the franchise, and I guess it does okay with that.  I don't do RTS or TBS very often.  Tactical games always feel like a game of Tic-Tac-Toe (as in, whoever moves first pretty much wins) and strategic games just get dull and tedious.  Remember, though, that as my other motto goes:  "If that's your thing I take joy in your joy".  As you can see, there's good reasons why I don't bring that motto out too often.

But the film.  Oh, the film.  I will concede that there were a few moments I liked, but overall, the acting was flat, the direction off, the CGI was absolutely horrible.  It looks like the standard low-effort movie tie-in.  I think there was even a Wilhelm Scream, just to fill out the Hack Checklist.

If they're going to make a story based on a vast universe like Warcraft, why not at the very least write an original story and use the established setting as a backdrop (shut up about Solo and Rogue One right this instant), maybe having the writers roll a toon and basing a story around that - like every fucking person who has ever played World of Warcraft?

Up next, I have to sit through this shit at least once more to finish the recap.  Three times just wasn't enough to fine-tune the Shitometer 6900SX.  Pity me.


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